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TO HEAL

Somewhere along the line, I lost a part of myself.

Day after day, I searched for it. Never realizing that the unending emptiness I tried so hard to relieve, was because a piece of me was missing.

I kept searching outward. With only an aching feeling of dissatisfaction to lead me.

Days would pass, and no matter what I did, this yearning never completely diminished.

I am broken.

And despite how sad that little sentence sounds, I feel myself at peace with that admission.

It feels like a step forward.

One that leads me closer to whatever it is I lost. I now know that I’ve been looking for it in the wrong place.

Up until this point, my search for fulfillment had been through external means. I depended on others to validate my existence, my self worth. And every time I did this, I was left wondering why such instances only brought fleeting moments of satisfaction.

It never lasted, and it always kept me aching, grasping for that feeling of wholeness once again.

I can’t pinpoint when or how I’ve become this way.

Somehow, without me even knowing it, I was shattered into these scattered fragments. And without ever realizing it, I’ve been piecing myself back together again

I am incomplete.

Acknowledgement is the first step to healing.

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